Step 3: Partnering With A Spiritual Companion

As you continue your journey into Christ-centered 3-C contemplative activism, we suggest you prayerfully consider Step Three: working with a Christ-centered spiritual director whose primary job is to simply come alongside you, becoming a spiritual companion in the care of your own soul.


In Spiritual Direction, the director and the directee come together for the primary purpose of engaging in meaningful spiritual conversations, focusing on the presence and activity of God in the directee’s life. In a word, Spiritual Direction is co-discernment, with the director holding space open for the directee, discerning together to “see what the Father is doing (John 5:19),” not just in that moment, but over the months and seasons of a person’s life. One author defines spiritual direction as a wonderful way to “dust for the fingerprints of God” in your life.

What are the tools of Spiritual Direction?

A trained spiritual director does her/his work through a combination of means: silence, prayer, reverent listening, excellent questions, keen observations, attention to the mind, affect, and body of the directee, self–awareness, and knowledge of both human personality and spiritual dynamics.

How do I know if Spiritual Direction is for me?

There are many reasons why someone enters into a spiritual direction relationship.  Maybe you recognize yourself in one of the following statements:

  • I feel like I’ve been at a plateau for a while. What new frontiers might God inviting me to explore?
  • I’ve heard of spiritual disciplines, but I really don’t know how to make sense of them for my life.
  • I would like to grow in my ability to notice God in my every day life.
  • I would like to know God better. I feel like I am at a stand-still in relating to Him.
  • I want to grow spiritually. What might be a few next steps?
  • I can’t see where I am in relation to God. I can’t see where I am headed.
  • My spiritual life doesn’t seem to work the way it used to. What is going on?
  • I would like to explore the intersection between my personal, spiritual life and my life of relationships and responsibilities.

The idea that only church leaders or those with great maturity in their faith can pursue Spiritual Direction is false. While, indeed, pastors and leaders will greatly benefit from working alongside a qualified spiritual director, Christ-centered Spiritual Direction is for anyone who desires to draw closer to God and to grow in his or her personal relationship with Jesus of Nazareth.


Spiritual direction is a prayer process in which a person seeking help in cultivating a deeper personal relationship with God meets with another for prayer and conversation that is focused on increasing awareness of God in the midst of life experiences and facilitating surrender to God’s will. David Benner

Watch a short video that describes the primary role of a spiritual director.

Read more about one person’s journey into spiritual direction.

Read a very convincing article, “Why We Need Spiritual Direction More Than Ever.”

What is the cost of Spiritual Direction?

A spiritual director will meet with you, generally, on a monthly basis. While in-person sessions are the common tradition, most directors can now meet with you via on-line communications or by phone. Every spiritual director will have his or her own specific fee/payment policy, but generally a one-hour session with a well-trained spiritual director typically costs $50 – $75.

Where can I find a well-qualified, Christ-centered Spiritual Director?

Once you’ve decided to look for a spiritual director, we suggest you begin your search here with our Spiritual Directors Network. It’s our vision, as a network of trained spiritual directors, to offer high quality, Christ-centered spiritual direction to any individual, group of individuals, or any church, ministry or non-profit organization that is looking to benefit from the absolute joys of receiving on-going spiritual direction. We personally know each of these directors listed here and highly recommend any of these wonderful men or women listed below.


Click here to see our growing list of well-qualified directors in our Spiritual Directors Network.